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Sometimes I get lost

March 27, 2011

I sat down this evening fully committed to finally filing my taxes.  However, it’s been about an hour and I haven’t even pulled up the Turbo Tax website yet.  First I got side tracked by checking email.  That turned into sorting, organizing and replying to emails.  Then I got side tracked by checking Facebook.  That turned into scanning status updates and looking through old pictures.  And then I got lost in my head.

While I often find myself side tracked online by the copious amounts of funny YouTube videos that need to be watched and the various social media outlets that I need to check, this whole getting lost in my head thing is a fairly recent occurrence.  It usually starts with something completely harmless like listening to a certain song or looking at a certain picture.  The memories all come flooding back, and once that flood gate is opened there is no turning back.  That’s when I officially get lost in my head.

I guess all the recent changes in my life have caused me to become hyper-sensitive to “what used to be”.  I know there is no point in having regrets or in wishing that I could have done things differently, but sometimes it is hard to remember that when I’m lost in my head.  Because when I’m in my head all I can think about is the frustration I feel for where I am now and the longing for what I used to have.

The good thing is that I don’t usually stay lost in my head for too long.  In fact, I only occasionally stay lost for an extended period of time.  I wish I could close this entry with some philosophical meaning for everything or at least with some words of encouragement saying that I figured out how not to dwell on the past.  However, that is not the case.  Mainly I just needed someplace to write about my feelings.  Sometimes writing it down helps bring me back from being lost.  At least for the time being.

One Comment leave one →
  1. April 9, 2011 9:33 pm

    I read this when you first wrote it. At the time I simply thought, Ditto. I keep remembering this post. Ah, change.

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